A Lesson in 'Man'ners

When people hear the word “chivalry,” classic examples of men exhibiting courteous behavior toward to women usually come to mind.

However, the idea of chivalry seems to be fading away in modern society.
According to AOL News, a high school teacher in Arizona started an etiquette course in his classroom because he did not agree with the boys’ behavior toward girls. Now the boys are instructed to stand up when girls enter the room, hold doors open and help their female classmates into their seats. According to the article, the teacher said the overall attitude of the class improved.

Today, students on Keene State College’s campus said they are seeing fewer and fewer examples of this traditionalism. This has led some students to believe chivalry is dead, while others believe there is still hope.

Member of the Counseling Center and co-founder of the Sexual Violence and Prevention program Forrest Seymour said he thinks chivalry is still alive but the ideas behind the concept have changed.

Seymour said chivalry, in today’s world, directly relates to men’s vision of women as something of value.

Seymour said he noticed less chivalrous actions between men and women and attributes the behavior to changing media and technology.

“Twenty years ago you could just say something offensive about women and no one would know about it,” Seymour said. “We have a much more outspoken society today with the Internet and anybody who wants to say offensive things can do it easily.”
Seymour also said he thinks feminism has become a driving force in shaping the world young adults live in.

“When we talk about ‘chivalry is dead,’ we’re talking about the people who are rebelling against the feminist ideas,” Seymour said.

However, this leaves a debatable question unanswered; how does our society define feminism?

KSC women’s studies professor Candice Bosse said she sees a mutual respect for men and women within the classroom. However, she said her female students reported otherwise outside of class.

“My students observe a misogynist attitude towards women where they get treated as more as sex objects and a commodity,” Bosse said.

Bosse said she thinks the debate between feminist women and chivalrous men needs to reach common ground. Bosse said there has to be a line between general respect for others and the ideology that women can’t live without men’s existence.

Bosse also said when she attended  the University of Maryland as an undergraduate student, the men would open doors for women but those same men would also bash feminism.

Nonetheless, most male students said they believe they are courteous and respectful to  ladies.

KSC senior Brandon Russell said he tries to keep chivalry alive by opening doors and being polite.

“I do my best to treat all women with respect and I think chivalry is still alive, but certain men give it a bad reputation,” Russell said.

While some male KSC students may think of themselves as polite people, other females think their male peers have a long way to go.

Junior Patricia Pomerleau said she would like to see an increase in chivalrous behavior.
“I think chivalry is dead; men are just into doing their own thing. I would love for men to be more polite,” Pomerleau said. “I don’t think you can call them men because they’re not fully matured.”

However, not all KSC women think of the age-old idea as a concept in its coffin.
“Some people will still hold doors open. It’s not as big of a thing anymore because guys are afraid of offending a feminist,” senior Meaghan Flanagan said.

Junior Bonnie Silkman agreed with Flanagan and said chivalry isn’t completely gone.
“Males step up in certain situations, for example, if you have to pick up something heavy, the guy does it. I wouldn’t necessarily say chivalry is dead,” Silkman said.

Paul Harris can be contacted at pharris@keeneequinox.com.